Guest Bloggers!!

As I inevitably do once a season, I have let you down this week. I could not watch the show last night. Get over it.

But...we have guest bloggers!! Two devoted Bachelorites took it upon themselves to blog the show last night in my absence. Let me introduce you all to Chikki Nabre, and Webe Apgar Philliams!

Part One: by Chikki Nabre. It comes in two parts. Her insights are highly-valued and astute and submitted via Blackberry device; hence the short quips.

Part One.

A. Seriously what's with the singing? Do they think that this is American idol? Don't they know it's America's top slut?
B. Ashlee may be the dumbest girl ever. Her laugh is ridiculous.
C. Wait is Amanda normal? I'm confused. I didn't think that they let normal people on this show?D. Pick me pick me pick me. Wait what? Seriously. Are you really that insecure and scary? Dude it's like week 4. Get it together.

Part Deux.

Ok Matt and Holly have an awesome connection and she's sweet but don't really think that she's the one who is going to "ask the difficult questions"

Wait what? He chose Marshana? Did not see that coming! But it kind of makes me like him more. She's super nice and sweet but not all that smart.

Wait he asks real smart questions. I like it.

Noelle seems like she's normal. I wonder if she is the sleeper crier / freak out girl.

Kelly is a drunk. And ps. He'll meet another girl like you. It's called last call at the dive bar.

Ok we know who the 2 are I think. Kelly the drunk and Ashlee our naïve hillbilly.Like his good strong handshake.

Ok wait I might be crushing on him. Ps. Kelly you're not the best. Hate to be the one to break it to you.

Sad Ashlee I feel like I am in a bad high school mini series. She wrote him a song. How could he not choose her?! :)


And to introduce our second guest blogger, Webe Apgar Philliams.

I can recap the Bachelor for you (please note it was the first episode I watched, so some of these observations will fall into the Captain Obvious category):

Our British Bachelor is beginning to understand that when he asked for 22-year-old hotties, he opened himself up to receiving some of the greenest, dumbest, most un-worldly lasses ever to hit the bachelor stage, but his attempts to "roll with it" range from the touching to the nauseating. My favorite parts were him explaining the meaning of the terms "a good sport" and "taking things in stride" to our American hot messes -- clearly very advanced turns of phrase with which only the most high-born European nobles are familiar.

A lot of other boring crap happened, including him not being able to dance, the brunette Robin being hated by all, and the girls attempting to impress him with their knowledge of tea and how long they can do handstands.

He booted the warbly singer chick Ashlee and the party girl who he basically accused of being a lesbian (Kelly) , as well as one of the vapid blondes (possibly Holly). This season is a train wreck and I am so much dumber for having watched it.

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Okay, back to me. there you have it folks, two amazing bloggers!!

We're down to six hoes:

Amanda
Chelsea
Marshana
Noelle
Robin
Shayne

May the best trainwreck win!

Until next week,

Mike